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This is the lightning round, Dave. We didn't make the rules. Anyway, I'm ready to blow my Referee's Sport Whistle™ if you don't answer before the Commercially Endorsed Game Clock expires. i think the lightning rounds over why dont we have a distraction to seal the deal hey mom i think harleydad over there is talkin about you jake? hehe yeah i think ur right gotta go catch up with him soon... ill wave hello for now i dont think hes noticing dammit jake look over here u goof gonna start a fire here will all this friendly wavin nope hes completely out to lunch just like all the harleyberts HIIIII JAKE JAKE JAKE DAMMIT HI Oh. Um sorry. H... hi roxy. Youre with us again and... and... i like that. :D thats it? hes right back at it with the bull guy whats with him he reminds me a lot of john but really quiet which is very unjohnish jakes great! but yeah hes not like that all the time he is p gregarious 1 on 1 but i guess he doesnt like crowds much he became sort of a hermit after a few months in our session he mainly hung out with dirk until he eventually sorta shut him out too dude just likes his lonesome time i guess? ill try gettin to know him some time maybe trap him like a shy woodland creature then brutally harangue him with my typically rad shit and become airtight bros right there in the fucking woods exactly how nature intended omg yes i will help u rig your jakesnares maybe leave some hunky dudebait, like a trail of microshorts sprinkled thru out the forest awesome thanks mom roxy i mean Dave, even I'm having less trouble referring to Roxy by her name consistently, and I was the one who grew up knowing her as my literal mother. What is going on with you? nothing its just like semi accidentally replacing a word with another word in a majority of instances why do you need to read things into everything You're right. How could anyone possibly read anything into that sort of repeated slip-up. exactly What if you're making her uncomfortable? its fine really! i think it is sorta endearing see rose yall worrying about nothing as usual moms fine with it moxy snort i mean romy mommy wait fuck ok that one was fucked up lets make sure i never ever fucking say that again im dyin here dave...stoppit im a sphyxiate i cant its like i was saying before this is a force of nature we all gotta just deal with striders blurtscapades daves flying boner circus this shit is immutable i had to face this fact a long time ago i could either try to change that part of myself which is an unwinnable war or i could try focusing on being like a vaguely half decent person so at least the shit i inevitably blurt out from deep down isnt all that bad because the bad stuff has been and is still being purged through an arduous long term process of complete and utter humiliation man arduous long term processes of complete and utter humiliation are basically my aesthetic anyways you are a silly dude and its ok if u keep callin me mom on "accident" :) I hope it is similarly ok with you if I make the conscious decision to refrain from calling you that ever. Unlike Dave, I've taken great pride in the meticulous maintenance of my internal filter. I don't think I have the same luxury he does. Humiliation just makes my demons angrier. yeah rose call me whatev! but um lmao you got a way of makin that sound legit scary its fucked up that shes joking but also not even really youll figure out how to crack her deadpan riddles theres an art to it you guys... an ur friggin psycho babble! its a riot suddenly feelin like maybe im the weak link in this family tree on the analytical front need to step up my game To be fair, Dave's game is pretty flimsy. He's been jacking my swagger for years. He only pulls it off because he's funny. And to be even fairer, I'm not actually much of a psychoanalyst. I know just enough to know that I barely know anything, and probably would have benefited from, I don't know, "college", or something. ok whew i feel a bit less lame then i remember dirks insane scrutinization of all things cerebral had a similar way of dwarfing ones ego maybe that was smoke in mirrors too idk maybe since he and i are ur parents, in terms of psycho skillz... hes got ALL genes and i got NONE so that means dave got SOME genes and rose got LOTS?? wherein SOME is more than NONE and LOTS is less than ALL ??? That's quite a scientific way of looking at it. Maybe it's even true? yeah i fuken LOVE SCIENCE!!! ok then that explains everything what if you got all the science genes then that means some scraped off on me which would explain why my beats are so ill its cause my science is off the charts Holy shit. Can someone come push this nerd off the lilypad? dat explanation tho :') Cringeworthy rap notwithstanding, I do recall hearing him babble about wanting to be a scientist on more than one occasion. If the world hadn't ended. What was it? Archeology? Paleontology? yeah i dunno one of those things whichever involved more dead shit maybe paleontology!! u wan…
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