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She has? God damn it. Have you been intercepting my messages again with your bullshit responder? I thought it would be better not to let anything disrupt our train of thought. We were in the middle of a fairly solid feelings jam there. In fact, I was about to suggest we take it to the hat pile. Hat pile? What? Dude, please don't screen my calls, ok? I was trying to be considerate. Or at least as close an approximation to that human gesture as an unfeeling, technologically transcendental pair of sunnies can replicate. Do you have any idea how old your ironic AI schtick has gotten? Nobody is buying it. We all know you have legit emotions. Incomprehensible, fucked up computer emotions, but emotions nonetheless. And I'm not really offended by you answering messages for me, so much as your use of that STUPID responder responder. It's really passive aggressive. How so? First of all, everyone knows you have the processing power to answer any message any time in parallel with whatever you're doing. You can never actually be "busy." Second, your whole next gen responder thing is obviously just a huge dig at me. And third, pretending you don't understand all this already is really disingenuous. At the risk of compounding my disingenuous behavior, I'm gonna have to ask: how is it a dig at you? It's obviously a critique of my personality. You barely disguise the fact that you see me as the inferior iteration. Wow. You are reading way too much into this. Lil Hal Junior hardly even qualifies as a computer program, let alone a sentient entity. He is capable of saying literally only three things. "Yes," "Hmm," and "Interesting." Yeah, that's the fucking point! That's how you chose to express your parody of "Real Dirk." You can read whatever you like into it. I can't imagine it would bother you if you weren't concerned there might be some truth in the alleged parody. In any case, my use of the responder responder is ironic. It's not ironic. YOU were ironic when I made you. Then you became self-aware, and ruined irony forever. Irony can never be ruined. We both proved that theorem unequivocally with our extensive papers on the subject. We peer reviewed them for each other. Remember? Those papers were ironic, and you know it. Were they, Dirk? Were they? This is fuckin' dumb. Anyway, what does she want. Who? Roxy. Nothing that can't wait.
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