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then what is it? I know how this is pro8a8ly going to sound, especially to a human. 8ut I just killed someone. you did? who was it? you mean like, a bad guy? Not exactly. oh yeah, karkat mentioned that he was in trouble, and then had to go. it made me a little worried! are you guys under attack or something? I'm not sure what his deal is. I haven't seen him in a while. 8ut we are not under attack. Not yet, at least. oh. well, then... who did you kill? He was a friend. Someone from our team. why? It's a little complicated. well, did he attack you or something? Yes. 8ut really, that's not why I killed him. He was no match for me, and I could have just incapacit8ed him or flown away or whatever. The truth is I killed him 8ecause at the time, I thought I wanted to, and sort of felt like I finally had to. uh... why did you have to? 8ecause enough was enough! You don't even know how frustr8ing it was to 8e friends with him. I used to really like him and always wanted to help him get stronger, so that he might stand a fucking chance to actually make it on our world. 8ut he was just soooooooo weak and indecisive. He wouldn't change! And when he tried to change, it was too little and too l8. Always l8. L8ey L8ey L88888888. Too l8 to kiss me. Too l8 to kill me. He couldn't do it when I really needed him to. So when I saw he was actually serious a8out trying to kill me now of all times... I just got SO AAAAAAAANGRY. I am still a 8it upset thinking a8out it. So I killed him. And I'm pretty sure he's dead for good now. wow. you're right, vriska. that does not sound good. I know! I know our races are completely different. And I really h8 the idea of you thinking worse of me 8ecause of this. 8ut I don't have anyone else to talk to a8out it! you don't? what about all of your friends? i bet karkat would listen. or what about terezi? she's pretty nice, isn't she? No no no no no no no no! I mean, yeah, they're fine. 8ut I can't talk to them! why not? For one thing, they would pro8a8ly just 8e pissed off at me for killing Tavros. And more importantly, there's no waaaaaaaay I could tell them how I really feel a8out it. well, how do you feel? Horri8le!!!!!!!! If any of my friends knew that, they would think I'm weak. oh... i guess i understand. i mean, i'm trying to, with the cultural difference and all. Do you? like, trolls are more violent and angry, right? kind of like klingons or something, which is an angry race of alien savages from a human tv show. We aren't savages, you dope! oh, i know, that's not what i meant! but i am guessing you all have to act tough to make it in your world, and have a sense of honor about fighting, and like to beat people up and stuff, right? Uh, yeah........ Let's say close enough! but i think that no matter what alien culture you are from, killing is still wrong! and it sounds like you do too. Yeah, see. This is where our cultures clash, I think. It would 8e difficult to explain exactly how killing is viewed on our planet with all the nuance involved. It just isn't the 8lack and white thing humans seem to think it is! well, you could try. i am listening. On my world, I would 8e completely vindic8ed for killing him! He is far lower on the hemospectrum than me. He managed to disrespect me time and time again, 8ut I kept letting him live! In fact, the amount of slack I cut him would 8e considered scandalous 8y those in my class. I had every reason to kill him. And yet... I feel 8ad a8out it like a lame weak fudge8lood, just like he was. And the fact that I feel 8ad is why I'm sort of freaking out right now! i think if you feel bad, it just means you have a conscience. which is good, right? No. That's not how it works. I'm supposed to 8e just fine with it. This was sort of like a test, and I'm afraid I might 8e failing. how was it like a test? Well, it was the first time I killed some8ody. ok. W8! Ok, that's not really true. What I meant was, it was the first time I killed some8ody I cared a8out. so... you killed other people, that you didn't care about? Yes. Sort of a lot, actually. 8ut there was a really good reason for that! hm. how many? or... do i want to know... Oh, it doesn't matter. Pro8a8ly many thousands. uhhhhhhhh. hopy shit... God, I know how this sounds! 8ut I had to feed her. My lusus I mean. I've 8asically 8een playing this role as a slave in the food chain my whole life. It is what she selected me to do. i guess that is why you didn't get along with her? Hell yes. i see. still, that is a LOT of killing. jesus... Yeah, 8ut I never felt anything a8out it. It was just normal life for me. but then you finally killed a guy you liked, and... not so cool anymore? Yeah. OH! Ok, that's not quite right. He's the second person I cared a8out who I killed. Man, I always forget a8out her! uh. I guess she wound up getting me 8ack pretty good though, so we're even. Oh, also, TECHNICALLY I attempted to kill that same guy around the same time. 8ut I just wound up paralyzing him! Oops, hahahaha. ... 8…
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