John: Answer CG.
JOHN WHAT THE WET BAG OF HUMAN HORSE SHIT TO THE FACE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING. OH MY LORD. NO WONDER YOU LOSERS ALL FUCK UP THIS GAME SO BAD. what? i am just acting out a scene from an awesome movie and having some fun, what's wrong with that? WHAT KIND OF CRAPPY EARTH MOVIE IS THIS. STUPID RABBIT ASSHOLE SCREWS THE POOCH? no, it's about these criminals on a runaway plane, and they've got to be stopped by nick cage and john cusack together as a team. OH. OK, THAT ACTUALLY SOUNDS PRETTY GOOD I GUESS. it is sweet, so sweet, you would probably like it. I'VE HEARD OF JOHN CUSACK I THINK. WASN'T HE IN SERENDIPITY? THAT WAS PRETTY GREAT FOR A HUMAN FLICK. hahaha, oh man, that sucked so bad! OK I DON'T SEE HOW WE'RE SUPPOSED TO BE BECOMING FRIENDS IF YOU RECOIL FROM MY OLIVE BRANCH LIKE I'M WIGGLING A GNARLED TREE MONSTER'S DICK IN YOUR DIRECTION. don't you have alien movies from your alien planet? YEAH OF COURSE, WE HAVE TONS OF MOVIES AND THEY ARE INFINITELY SUPERIOR TO YOUR PRIMITIVE CINEMATIC NEANDERTHRASHINGS. ok, so what is a really good one? YOU'LL PROBABLY LAUGH IF I TELL YOU THE NAME OF ONE. well, i already laughed when you said the name of one of ours, so who cares? OK FINE. ONE THAT IS AMAZING AND IS A CLASSIC IS... WHEREIN NUMEROUS VIGILANTES CONFRONT PERIL; ONE OF THEM BETRAYS THE OTHERS; (BUT IT TURNS OUT TO BE PART OF THE PLAN ALL ALONG); SEVERAL ATTRACTIVE FEMALE LEADS PROVOKE ROMANTIC TENSION; FOUR MAJOR CHARACTERS WEAR UNUSUAL HATS; ONE HOLDS PLOT-CRITICAL SECRET; 47 ON-SCREEN EXPLOSIONS, ONE RESULTING IN DEMISE OF KEY-ADVERSARY; 6 to 20 LINES THAT COULD BE CONSTRUED AS HUMOROUS; wait... this is the title? IT GOES ON. THEY TEND TO BE MORE LITERAL AND INFORMATIVE THAN YOUR TITLES. how do you even say them in casual conversation? WELL WE DON'T OBVIOUSLY. IT'S LIKE SOMEONE SAYS, HEY GUYS WHY DON'T WE GO SEE A MOVIE, AND THEN EVERYONE JUST ENDS UP THERE. WATCHING IT. NOT SAYING IT, THAT'S DUMB. JOHN, TRY TO THINK OUTSIDE YOUR MINUSCULE CULTURAL BUBBLE FOR A CHANGE. ok, i just think it's still cumbersome and completely illogical. YEAH THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU START RUNNING OUT OF MOVIE TITLES AFTER RACKING UP THOUSANDS OF YEARS OF FILM HISTORY. YOU KNOW I THINK YOUR CIVILIZATION JUST DIDN'T MATURE ENOUGH OR SOMETHING. BEFORE LETTING THIS EARTH ARABIAN YOU CALL A GENIE OUT OF THE BOTTLE. MUST EXPLAIN WHY IT SPROUTED SUCH A MISERABLE CROP OF PLAYERS. INSTEAD OF BASICALLY GODS LIKE US. well, i've got one of your godly players helping me now, so we can't be in such bad shape. WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT. GC gave me a map. and showed me a shortcut. WHAT THE HELL IS SHE DOING. THIS ISN'T WHAT WE TALKED ABOUT DOING AT ALL. HOLD ON LET ME ASK HER ABOUT THIS... ok. OK... NOW SHES JUST OVER THERE GIGGLING AT ME LIKE AN IMBECILE. WHAT ARE YOU TWO UP TO, WHY ARE YOU IN CAHOOTS NOW? umm... OW FUCK!!! OK SHE JUST WALKED OVER AND PUNCHED ME. AND SAID IT WAS FROM YOU. uh, sorry i guess? I TOLD HER TO STOP THESE SHENANIGANS... BUT IT SEEMS LIKE WHATEVER SHE WAS DOING WITH YOU SHE ALREADY DID A WHILE AGO. FROM MY PERSPECTIVE AT LEAST. i don't know why you guys are doing this to yourselves. all this time jackassery, it's giving me a headache. OK IF YOU TALK TO HER AGAIN WHEN SHE TRIES HATCHING MORE PLANS GIVE HER A MESSAGE INTO THE PAST FOR ME. ok. TELL HER TO POLISH MY HEAVING BONE BULGE AND SET A TABLE FOR FUCKING TWO ON IT. ITS FOR OUR CANDLE LIGHT HATE DATE. i like how you guys have basically resorted to trolling each other, through us. FUCK YOU. oh, did you talk to jade yet? JADE, WHAT WHY WOULD I WANT TO TALK TO HER? ummm, that's what you said you wanted to do last time you talked to me, i dunno. OH DAMMIT. ARE YOU SURE? yeah, you told me dude. want me to paste the conversation? NO NO, GOD NO, I HATE IT WHEN WE START GOING DOWN THAT ROAD. OK THIS IS GOING TO REQUIRE FURTHER INVESTIGATION. I'VE GOT TO GO. ok. but next time you talk to me, you might want to tell me to calm down first so i don't just block you. back then i won't really want to hear from you. OK, I'LL DO THAT. later.
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